Zumba!

I've started doing Zumba Fitness for the Kinect, wow! This will be a lot of fun once I'm able to do it without taking short breaks after every song to sigh obnoxiously and count down the songs until I'm done! It's a workout like I've never done. It keeps me coming back day after day, and that is very special to me! I need the motivation. I had a doctors appointment last week that confirmed how important this hill is to climb. I won't get into specifics but lets just say I need to stick with it this time. For once, and for all. Sometimes I feel bad because in the past I've failed but in the grand scheme of things, who cares? Who will remember how many times I've failed miserably, if I finally do the damn thing? Nobody. And if they do remember, maybe seeing me cross the finish line will make them all the more proud! If not, f em. 

I got a new tattoo last week to remind myself to keep going and to not give up! Believe (in myself) & Persevere. The shooting star is in honor of my Grandmother. I love it! I would have loved it more if the first time I had it done it was spelled properly. Hence the large V in persevere there to cover up the R that was added and that shouts COVER UP. Oh well, what are you going to do? It might not have ended up as the prettiest thing ever, but it means so much to me that I really don't care. If you think it's ugly, so be it. It's a good thing I didn't get it with what you thought in mind. 

It's come in handy so far, I've actually wanted to eat something horrible for me or stop mid song and just 'get by' but I took one look and remembered- KEEP GOING. It'll be worth it someday.

and four months later...

I'm a married woman! So no, I did not lose 50 lbs. but I did feel absolutely beautiful and confident standing beside that amazing man! It's the journey, not the destination. I'm still digging in everyday trying to make the best decision for myself and my future. It's not always easy, but what is? Nothing is easy, ever! You have to learn to roll with the punches and take it one day at a time. I did lose close to 20 lbs and that's no small feat!

Stay tuned, I still plan on completing my goal of living a healthy life at a healthy weight!

I Hate Dieting

Yup! I do, I hate it. Dress it up as a lifestyle change and I still hate it. I've all but given up! I try to stay positive. It's just the one thing I am horrible at. I am horrible at making good food choices and work out choices! The thing I am most awful at is sticking with it. So while I'm only half way through reading my book I am determined tomorrow to get back up on this horse and try again! It only takes one right move, one foot in front of the other. Here we go again!!

I'm back!

I didn't really go anywhere, but I didn't know what to title this blog. I'm still reading the Blood Sugar Solution and so far, so good! I found my wedding dress this last Saturday and that has provided some insane motivation. The book is about using medicine as food. It makes sense to me, it's like a car and gasoline. It won't run on water- it runs on specially formulated fuel. Our bodies also need fuel. I still eat crap that I don't know why I eat. I'm working on it! We might be getting a puppy on Sunday and he will serve as my inspiration to WALK. I need to get out, exercise. The weather is so nice lately, upper 70s in March, in OHIO. Once I develop said plan I will start talking to you all again. Failure sucks and this is about the 900th time I've started something at 100% passion and in a short time dropped off the map. My goal was that this blog would motivate me. We've had some house stuff going on, but it's no excuse. Time to get back in the saddle and change my life! Thank you for staying with me on this journey!

I have a plan

I ordered the book by Dr. Mark Hyman called the Blood Sugar Solution. Finally a plan! I hope all is well and gives me all I've been searching for! I will let you know of course!

Hello...Anybody there?

Shit. It's almost been a month since I posted! Once again- that shows my commitment. I've been lacking in the "Just do it" department. My life is the same, I just lose interest. I haven't given up on it still! I'm trying to remain mindful of what I'm doing and the choices I'm making. I need a plan. I need a serious pull it together plan. Tomorrow will be a great day for researching said plan. I haven't forgotten about you my little blog and I haven't forgotten about those 50 lbs I'm supposed to make disappear either. Countdown is now more like 3 months then 5. 30 lbs is still good? I'm not giving up on my 50 lb goal. I just have to get it together! Goal for tomorrow: Get a plan Goal for day after tomorrow: stick to it.

Tomorrow is Friday. YAY!

My one month house anniversary post never happened because nothing happened. It came and went and I had dinner with my girls instead, so anti-climatic! Bummer. I do plan on celebrating, maybe this weekend? I haven't posted and that should reflect how awful this week has been when it comes to dieting. Today was alright at lunch I started to get back on track with a nice array of spinach (raw) and chicken sausages then I came home and we ordered pizza. We won a free pizza and a 2 liter of soda from Papa Johns for correctly guessing the coin toss! That shouldn't have meant a pass to eat 4 slices. Last I knew I had lost 5 lbs of my 50. Not a great way to start a life change.  I am not giving up- AT ALL. Life happens, shitty food happens. Tomorrow is another day! Back a few posts when I was talking about temptation, I forgot to add my biggest blunder which leads to off track. That would be no groceries. We start running out of the healthy yummy stuff and start eating our frozen until forever food. I hate this routine and we need to break out of it. I think I really need to get Chris some cooking lessons. It would help out so so so much!

Tessa aka T Money (my boss called me that today, love it!)